Scare of a lifetime...

I do not think I have shed as many tears over the unknown as I did today... Two weeks ago tonight, I discovered the the right lymph node under Maggie's arm was extremely swollen. At that time, she had some sinus stuff happening, but no infection. On Wednesday night of that week, she woke up in the middle of the night crying that she couldn't touch her right thumb because it hurt so bad. I crawled out of bed to find that it was red, swollen and showed signs of infection. Maggie allowed me to poke it with a needle to release the pressure and we put peroxide on it and neosporin. We bandaged it and treated it twice a day to speed up the healing process. Thursday night, she woke up with a severe ear infection - probably the worse she has ever had. I took her to the doctor at 8:00 and was seen by her doctor which was a relief. I mentioned the lymph node to her since we were there and the look on her face was a bit alarming to me. However, she never took blood work or measured the lymph node (so I thought). She simply told me to keep an eye on it, not to touch it and come back in if it was not better after 10-14 days. We finished her ten day round of antibiotic and I wasn't seeing any drastic improvement. I totally allowed satan to invade my mind. I have read far too many blogs about childhood cancer and I knew that there didn't have to be any other signs other than a lump for cancer to be ravaging her body. I called at 8:30 this morning just hoping to get the reassurance that I needed that it was okay to just keep watching it. Instead, I got my least favorite nurse that doesn't have children of her own and has no idea what kind of fear a mother has when it comes to the well-being for her child. She told me that she needed to be seen as soon as possible. The good news was both doctors working were older and had seen just about everything. God totally had control over who we saw. He knew that I needed to understand what was going on and to be convinced that I had nothing to worry about. The doctor came in and examined her lymph node. He was extremely thorough and he assured me that since it was soft and mobile that he didn't think it was anything serious. He explained each and every step that he made. He checked all of her surface lymph nodes, her spleen and her live. There was no other swelling. He also explained the lymph node system and how it works which I thought was very sweet of him to take the time to do. As a final precaution, he ordered CBC (blood counts). Maggie quickly caught on to what was about to happen and the for the first time in a very long time, I didn't have to hold her down. I think deep down, she knew that we needed to know the results. I was so relieved when the doctor came back in and said that everything was within normal range. He said her numbers looked great!!! He said that if her red blood count or platelets were low then we would be headed to a hematologist, but that was not needed - Thanks You GOD!!

The only problem we had was Maggie's ear had not healed, so she needed another round of antibiotics. Plus the next round should also help with the lymph node. I wish that I had been given the same explanation on that Friday morning and a lot of fear could have been avoided. That really doesn't matter now...All that matters is my sweet girl is perfectly healthy!! There is no monster invading her body and I am so thankful. She got to choose her celebration dinner at El Mez Cal!!!

I have to share this story only so Maggie will one day know how worried we were. I cried the moment the nurse told me we had to come in. I called Daddy crying... I got it together and called Cacki, of course I broke down and cried. Everyone I talked to today got to hear me sobbing on the other end. FEAR of the unknown was invading my every thought. Cacki was so scared as well, but she always has a way of holding it together and being strong for us. She sent me a little email that revealed to me just how scared she was. While we were waiting for the blood work, I called Daddy and told him that so far everything looked okay and I told him to go ahead and call Cacki. When I called him back to tell him everything was PERFECT, he said I would never believe where Cacki had been. She wanted to make sure that she was available if we needed her, so she had been sitting outside the doctor's office - just in case!!! I cannot tell you how much that meant to me. I cried all over again when I heard that!! Thanks Cacki!!!

Funny story of the day... Molly never leaves my side, so there was no hiding the fact that I was upset today. She would ask me why I was crying and if I was going to cry again... She overheard me explaining to someone on the phone that I wouldn't be so scared, but my friend Kerry found her breast cancer thanks to her lymph node under her arm. That was all I could think about. Molly asked me again why I was crying and I just explained to her that I was scared about Maggie's arm and she said I am scared, too. Then without skipping a beat, she said, " I know why you are scared, you are scared that Maggie has breast cancer!!". I couldn't help but to laugh at her innocence. I told her I wasn't scared about breast cancer because Maggie didn't even have boobs yet.. She yanked her shirt up and she said, "we she has little boobies like these.." It was a laugh that I desperately needed. Since it made me laugh once, she kept saying it over and over. When Mike got home from work, she made the announcement...."Daddy, Maggie's gonna live!!!" Never a dull moment when she is around.